Let's be real. We all make lists of things we promise to change or do differently in the upcoming calendar year but secretly know we are about as close to keeping them as Li Lo is to a longterm stay-out of-rehab spell. I've put together a few resolutions I know I won't be keeping in 2011. Here they are:
6. I won't update my Fb status hourly with long, extremely detailed descriptions of my entire day, #followedbyanunecessarylengthyhashtag.
5. I promise not to stop saying the word "literally" when what I really mean is not at all literal, but in fact, very figurative.
4. I will not reset my clocks to the acceptable 5 or 10 minutes fast. Me and the 12 or 13 minutes incriments get by just fine, thank you.
3. And nope, I am not going to go to bed any earlier. Neither will I plan on waking up with early bird/worm catchin' crowd.
2. I won't stop falling off my couch any time something extra ridiculous/hilarious happens on TV/to my roommates/on Fb. Literally.
And my number one un-resolution for 2011:
1. I will follow through with all of the above resolutions. I will follow through with the above resolutions ...
Happy New Year to y'all! Here's to a year full of unkept promises & unfulfilled resolutions.
Cheers,
Lorin
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